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 Boek: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands 
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Geregistreerd: di nov 19, 2002 1:41 pm
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Bericht Boek: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands
The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands

In her most provocative book yet, Dr. Laura Schlessinger urgently reminds women that to take proper care of their husbands is to ensure themselves the happiness and satisfaction they yearn for in marriage.

Women want to be in love, get married, and live happily ever after. Yet disrespect for men and disregard for the value, feelings, and needs of husbands has fast become the standard for male-female relations in America. Those two attitudes clash in unfortunate ways to create struggle and strife in what could be a beautiful relationship.

Countless women call Dr. Laura, unhappy in their marriages and seemingly at a loss to understand the incredible power they have over their men to create the kind of home life they yearn for. Now, in The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, Dr. Laura shows you -- with real-life examples and real-life solutions -- how to wield that power to attain all the sexual pleasure, intimacy, love, joy, and peace you want in your life.

Dr. Laura's simple principles have changed the lives of millions. Now they can change yours.

Door werk/kids krijgen veel vrouwen last van het hurried woman syndrome (moe, dik, chagrijnig, geen tijd vor koken en geen zin in seks).

Kortom een (Amerikaans-hoe kan het ook anders) pleidooi om de vrouw weer naar de keuken te verbannen en haar te laten zorgen voor haar man, want 'Je man niet de seks geven waaraan hij behoefte heeft, is ook een vorm van ontrouw.' Dit boek is daarmee niet alleen negatief t.o.v. van de moderne vrouw, maar ook voor de man. Alsof mannen alleen seks en eten nodig hebben... Door recensenten niet erg serieus genomen, maar behoorlijk verkocht.

Rare jongen die Amerikanen :lol:

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zo sep 12, 2004 7:00 pm
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Geregistreerd: di nov 19, 2002 1:41 pm
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En nog een interview met haar:

The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands


by Dr. Laura Schlessinger

An Interview with Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Why did you write this book aiming at the women -- aren't both responsible for the quality of the marriage?

Of course! However, women are in the unique position of having an extraordinary amount of influence over their husbands, which when exercised thoughtfully, compassionately, lovingly, and intelligently results in a happier husband who will 'swim through shark infested waters to bring her a lemonade.' Women seem not to understand, or underestimate, the profound power they have over their husbands. Men are very emotionally dependent upon women from the day they are born to the day they expire. This book teaches women to use this power benevolently -- which will definitely result in them being happier with life and love.

What are the most common complaints men have about their wives?

Their women don't seem to have much regard for their feelings and needs
Their women constantly criticize and dismiss them
Their women don't seem to want to go out of their way to please them
Their women nag, demand, and complain -- and seem to behave as though they were entitled to do so
Their women don't make them feel truly needed and valued as men
What are husbands' most important needs?

He wants to feel like a "man" to his woman; he wants to feel that he is providing and protecting
He wants to feel that she needs and admires him
He wants to know that she desires him
Basically, The Three A's: appreciation, approval, and affection
What is the number one worst mistake women make with respect to being happy in their marriages?

They marinate in negatives. It is typical of women to fester and ferment over disappointments, slights, annoyances, angers, etc. Women, more typically than men, will go over it ad infinitum in the own heads, with their mothers, sisters, friends, co-workers, neighbors, social groups (remember Jerry McGuire?) -- in doing so they reinforce the negative and create a bad attitude -- one which turns into entitlement for not being particularly nice.

Attitude is about believing that your mate has your best interests at heart; it is about not letting loving feelings be squelched by everyday annoyances and disappointments; it is about benefit of the doubt; it is about cherishing the moments and living for the well-being of the other and being sustained by the joy of giving and the blessing of receiving in return.

All through the book you say "men are simple" ... isn't that an insult?

Not at all! In fact, most all of the many hundreds of responses I received from men in preparing this book confirmed just that: "Men are only interested in two things: If I'm not horny, make me a sandwich," and "As a man, I can tell you our needs are simple. We want to be fed, we want our kids mothered, and we want lovin'."

What about sex? Are wives obligated to give their husbands sex on demand?

As a woman who happens to believe that orgasms are a fabulous gift and blessing from God, I am amazed at how many women callers are willing to give them up to the gods of "I'm tired," or "I'm annoyed." Now, anyone can not be in the mood from time to time -- that's natural. However, the denigration of male sexual needs (They are just animals) and the use of sex to punish or control (You didn't do what I wanted) and inappropriate prioritizing (My work and children take all my energy) are self-centered and self-defeating. I ask my women callers who complain that their husbands are not happy with virtually no sexual intimacy (and, by the way, that's what the men truly feel about sex with their wives -- it's the ultimate in 'acceptance and approval' for them) if they would be satisfied with that profound a rejection and dismissal. They always say, "No, I guess not." Frankly, too many women treat their husbands as accessories instead of priorities.

Are there any marital situations for which your book does not apply?

Yes, most definitely. Where the behavior of the husbands is blatantly destructive, dangerous or evil, this book does not apply.

However, these ideas and techniques have salvaged and revitalized innumerable strained, stagnant, boring, disappointing, annoying, frustrating, and even seemingly dead marriages. When I nag a woman caller to try just one simple behavior for one day -- I inevitably get the call back that they are amazed at the difference a day made.

Are you going to write the book for men on the proper care and feeding of wives?

Nope. Men are borne of women and between girlfriends and then a wife; men spend their entire lives in the tutelage of women. What women accept or reject is largely the guiding force for what men will and won't do. When they are treated with the Three A's, they naturally, and in gratitude and affection, give their women the attention, regard, respect, support, and love they want. The ideas and techniques in this book are simple and sweet. What a blessing for women to know that they largely control their own happiness! My job is to get their prejudices and bad attitudes out of their own way. Transforming your guy into a loving man is its own reward.

bron: (http://www.harpercollins.com/catalog/bo ... 0060520612)

Er zit af en toe een vleugje van waarheid in, maar ze is toch behoorlijk geschift naar mijn mening.

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zo sep 12, 2004 7:12 pm
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"Men are only interested in two things: If I'm not horny, make me a sandwich," :lol:

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zo sep 12, 2004 7:45 pm
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Geregistreerd: za nov 02, 2002 5:30 am
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Wow, pas toen je in het nederlands verder ging kreeg ik door dat het geen grap was, maar serieus bedoeld!! :lol:
Damn. Ik heb ooit een politieke bibliotheek opgericht. Wij hadden een dergelijk boek in de collectie, maar dan typisch jaren 50. We hadden ook een erg goed zoeksysteem. Het boek stond bij de rubriek fascisme, naast negerhut van Oom Tom. :)

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ma sep 13, 2004 3:04 am
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Geregistreerd: di nov 19, 2002 1:41 pm
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De geschiedenis herhaalt zich :)

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ma sep 13, 2004 11:14 am
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